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  • Writer's pictureKellen Lounsbury

Finding Yourself Again

Updated: Oct 27, 2021

By: Kellen Lounsbury



There are moments when we face an overwhelming amount of darkness in life. This darkness can push us so far away from ourselves that we eventually lose sight of where we are, who we are, and what we stand for.


When we tend to lose these core and foundational values, everything else in our lives falls into a perpetual unbalanced state. It breaks down and cascades into a series of broken choices, actions, and reasons that propel us into a path we may not want to go down. Ultimately this leads to us being lost.


Finding yourself isn’t easy, each person deals with the process at their own pace. In the following sections below I will be discussing some of the details about this process and some things that you can do to find yourself again. But before we can find ourselves, let’s talk about losing ourselves



Losing Yourself


We tend to believe that “losing ourselves” is a negative aspect, but I would argue that it is the wording of the statement. No one intends to lose themselves, but straying from the norm, from the path, it opens up the possibility of other pursuits.


These pursuits may lead you to learn more about yourself, and you may have never realized what you were capable of unless you strayed from the path, to begin with.


“Sometimes we can only find ourselves by losing ourselves” - Richard Paul Evans

Questionably we have to ask ourselves if being lost is benefiting ourselves or if it is doing more harm than good. We may need to retrace our steps and find our way back to the trail. Though sometimes we find ourselves way to deep into the woods, and making it back might be too risky, so following through on the journey means we may pop out on a trail somewhere ahead.


If we are going to undertake this journey, then it would be wise to have a sense of self.



Who Are You

The existential question that we have all been asking since the dawn of humanity, “Who am I?”


So who are you?

  • Do you have a purpose?

  • Are you someone who lives in accordance with their purpose?

  • Is your life more than merely your purpose, where do you emotionally place yourself?

  • Is there something that you love that motivates you every day to all that you do?

  • How do you ultimately want to live your life?


Knowing who we are, starts with the questions we ask ourselves. It also runs along with the observations we take in our everyday lives. Maybe we have certain habitual traits, maybe we may not even realize it, are these just subconsciously autonomous, or are they something you consciously agree with?


The self is not entirely fixed, and I would debate that it is fully fixed, to begin with. I think it is quite closed-minded to think that with as many processes as life is running, that the self is purely fixed to one state, maybe the argument can be made that we have many versions of the self, but a singular self, in my opinion, is debatable. The self we associate with, uphold, and fall in line with is the one we become to know and people tend to associate with us.


Below you will learn five ways that you can learn to start finding yourself again, so you can become who you feel you truly are.



Five Ways to Find Yourself Again

1. Journal Your Journey


This is one of my favorite methods for getting back to the core self. We tend to slowly adopt ideas and experiences from the outside world, and over time the perceptions and emotions that we hold can become complex. By journaling our journey, we can keep track of where our ideas came from, where we started to develop our thought processes, and even organize our thoughts.


2. Walking Meditation


This is actually a very underrated version of meditation. The idea of walking meditation is exactly what it sounds like. Though the reason that I suggest walking meditation is because of its obvious health benefits, it actually sends more blood to the brain and increases circulation, and allows you to make more neurological connections and think with clarity.


3. Rediscover Old Hobbies


You may feel that you have outgrown old hobbies, maybe you feel that you’re too old, or that you don’t have the time anymore. The thing is, we are as old as we feel mentally. If there was something you did when you were younger and you would actually like to get back to it, start back up again. This could lead you to the path that brought you where you are today.


4. Discover The World


Sometimes we just need to see the world with a fresh set of eyes to remember who we are. We get caught up in the same old mundane routines and slowly our minds start to just tune everything out. This cyclic habitual nature eventually keeps us trapped. If there is something that you have been wanting to do, set some time aside, set your routine aside, and go explore. You can always come back later.


5. Change Up Your Routine


We may begin to forget who we are merely because we confuse what we do every day with who we are. While there is some truth behind our actions, I wouldn’t say its the absolute defining element of an individual’s persona. We are creatures that are filled with emotions, dreams, logic, creativity, genius and so much more. You are more than what you merely do, you are a collaboration of all these things.


Set up your days and routines differently, and even consider maybe breaking routine every now and then with a healthy amount of self-discipline to get back to what you need to do. If we only do what is needed, then we never take the time to notice all the elements outside of our routine every day.


Get creative, change it up.


Sense Of Self


Our sense of self is defined by how we consciously and unconsciously align with our identity. It is not how we are defined by the outside world, opinions, or even remarks on a day to day basis.


It is how we decide to define ourselves. The self is not just about who we choose to be, but also about who we have always been. Though we are fluid creatures, the higher our conscious acknowledgment and management of our choices, the more we can choose who we become.


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Sincerely, - Kellen L.

 

Relentless Fortitude, Strength, Motivation
Relentless Fortitude Motivation, Relentless Fortitude, Strength, Philosophy, Motivation
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